Naked: adj, not wearing clothes

Nude: adj, naked for the purpose of being observed. Often for purposes of arousal

In my world view, one of the reasons why privacy is a fundamental human desire is not because what people do in private is necessarily embarrassing, shameful, evil or even unusual. Rather, I see privacy as a crucial enabling component for intimacy.

Privacy lets you choose what you share, when, and with whom. For many people, myself included, that sharing of something others don’t get is also a potent expression of affection and trust.

This is also part of why, in the right context, sending someone nude pictures can be really fucking hot.

There’s also a whole heap of nuance that I’m still getting to grips with in terms of sharing nudes. I post occasional ones on my blog or Instagram (oh, I’m on Instagram now, btw). But I don’t feel it would be the same if I sent a pic to a partner that was already out there for all to see.

Then again, what happens when one has multiple partners that you share pics with? Is it ok for a nude selfie to do double duty? Do you let people know if they are/aren’t the sole recipient of an image? I feel like there should be an etiquette manual for this!

At the moment I’m also thinking about my dick. It occasionally creeps into nudes I post online, but is fairly unobtrusive (I was appalled when Instagram pulled down one of my posts that barely had any penis at all in it). It’s also pretty much always flaccid in these pictures which (and I’m not meaning to humble brag) makes a really noticeable difference in my case.

For the time being at least I’m reserving firm, proud, tumescent throbbing shots for people I’m in a dynamic with. But even then there’s a part of me hopes they appreciate that a picture of a stiffy can represent more than just the excitement of that moment.

I mean, sometimes it’s wearing a little hat.